What Uncovered Breastfeeding Really Looks Like

   With society rising out of the dark ages of birth and formula, breastfeeding has become a major topic.

To cover or not to cover?

   This seems to be a HUGE discussion with pro-breastfeeders and the "yeah yeah, it's the best for your baby- cover the dang thing up!"ers.  I would like to share my experience with #1 and what I've learned about covered and uncovered nursing.
   First of all, uncovered nursing does not mean that your boob is hanging out there in front of God and everybody else, it just means that your not wearing "the tent" as it is affectionately referred to. Why would someone not want to wear a cover in the first place? Let me first ask this- have you ever tried to get a squirmy, hungry newborn to latch under one of those things?! Newborns don't latch on their own, they need a little help finding the bulls eye. So they're squirming, and crying, and trying to latch on to anything but your boob all while you're juggling them and the tent- which is hot, likes to flash people unexpectedly and did I mention HOT?  This may seem a little exaggerated to you, maybe you didn't have as much trouble but I did NOT like the cover, honestly I used it more as a changing pad and emergency blanket than a cover.
  But then one day I was tired, feeling slightly brassy and my baby girl was hungry. I was wearing a nursing tank top (super easy to make by the way) under a regular shirt and I realized after getting her latched on that my shirt covered the top of my boob and the tank top covered my side and belly while my nursing baby's head covered the rest. Glory glory hallelujah! I turned to my mother, who was sitting beside me and was like "this is the best thing ever!" and then said, "Oh yeah, I never had nursing tops with you kids, I just wore a flowing shirt and the baby covered the important stuff".
   The funny discovery that I've made about uncovered nursing is that, at least for me, it's far more discreet than the tent.  Not yet have a gotten a single dirty look for nursing my baby in public, mostly because they can't tell!  Seriously, I have had people come up and pet #1's head while she was attached.  They had absolutely no idea that I was nursing, they simply assumed that she was sleeping all nice and cozy.  I've had pictures taken of me and posted on the internet while I was nursing no one new.  This is a perfect example, and incidentally the only one I could find...

  So really my only point is that uncovered nursing isn't necessarily indecent or bare boobing it.  There are mothers that are comfortable with exposing the whole thing and that's between them, their husbands, and God. (<--- I don't have time to go into all that!) I am personally not comfortable doing it myself.

   If you're having trouble nursing in public or you're expecting and wondering how the heck you're going to feed the kid when you're grocery shopping (because you know that whole 2-3 hours between feedings is a lie... until they're like 3 months and even then it's circumstantial)  consider making, or buying ($$$) a nursing tank and giving scandalous uncovered nursing a try, you may just find that it works for you. 

The Azalea Baby Blanket

    I love making things in general, and making things for my babies is even more rewarding.  It is my goal to make something special for every baby we have; it's my little way of showing them my love.
   So this is our little #2's blanket. The pattern is original (aka, I'm too cheap to buy a pattern) so bare with me as I try to write it out for you.

Right, here goes nothing..

 Don't mind the toys in the background, #1 was playing

The Azalea Baby Blanket

   First, I feel like I should say that the name of the pattern comes from our azalea bush in the back yard, the one I see every day (more like every few hours) when I do the dishes.  I bought the yarn-Red Heart's with Love, medium weight yarn in boysenberry- and right afterwards the bush bloomed and incidentally, was the same color.  Also note that I do not use any abbreviations in this pattern, aside from ssk, mainly because I have a terrible time understanding the abbreviations much less writing them   Anyways, back to the pattern.

Materials
Medium weight yarn
9 US knitting needles (I used a round for this project)
An extra needle to hold your cable.. or the actual special needle.. I have no idea what it's called..

Bottom Border
Cast on 132 stitches
Knit 1, purl 1 etc. to the end of the row (you should end on purl)
Now purl 1, knit 1 etc. (so knit on top of knit and purl on top of purl, aka a moss stitch)
Continue this until you have knitted about 2 inches.

Body of the Blanket
1.Right side- Moss stitch for 8 stitches, then knit 2 (this is your side border)
Purl 4, knit 2, repeat 17 times
Purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end (8 stiches)
Wrong side- Moss stitch for 8 stitches, then purl 2
Knit 4, purl 2, repeat 17 times
Knit 4, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

It should start to look like you have 18 nice little cables popping out.  Keep this up for 8 rows, ending on the wrong side. Now for the fun part.

2a. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2
Purl 4, pick up 1 purl side *, knit 1, ssk (slip slip knit), purl 2, knit 2 together, knit 1
Pick up 1, purl 4, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk, purl 2, knit 2 together, knit 1
Repeat the previous line (this one ^) 7 times
Pick up 1, purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end
Wrong side- Moss stitch 8, purl 2
Knit 5, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Knit 6, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Repeat previous line 7 times
Knit 5, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

2b. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2
Purl 5, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk, knit 2 together, knit 1
Pick up 1, purl 6, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk, knit 2 together, knit 1
Repeat previous line 7 times
Pick up one, purl 5, knit 2, moss stitch to the end

Now your cables should be paired together.

Wrong side- Moss stitch 8, purl 2
Knit 6, place 2 stitches on another needle letting it hag on your side of the project (meaning that the first cable will pass behind the second), purl 2, go back to stitches on the other needle and purl (2)
Knit 8, 2 stitches on needle, purl 2, purl stitches on other needle
Repeat previous line 7 times
Knit 6, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

So if you can read my gobbligook your cables should now be crossed with the first cable in each pair passing behind the second.

3a. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2
Purl 5, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 2, knit one, ssk
Purl 6, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 2, knit one, ssk
Repeat last line 8 times
Purl 5, knit 2, moss stitch to the end
Wrong side- Moss stitch 8, purl 2
Knit 5, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Knit 6, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Repeat previous line 7 times
Knit 5, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

3b. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2
Purl 4, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up one, purl 2, pick up one, knit 1, ssk
Repeat last line 8 times
Purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end.
Wrong side- Moss stich 8, purl 2
Purl 4, knit 2
Repeat previous line 17 times
Purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end

Now work sequence 1 for 4 rows instead of 8

4a. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2
Purl 4, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk, purl 2, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 1, purl 4
Repeat previous line 7 times
Knit 2, purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end
Wrong side- Moss stitch 8, purl 2
Knit 4, purl 2
Knit 5, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Knit 6, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Repeat previous line 7 times
Knit 5, purl 2, knit 4, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

4b. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2
Purl 5, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 1
Purl 6, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 1
Repeat previous line 6 times
Purl 5, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end
Wrong side- Moss stitch 8, purl 2, knit 4, purl 2
Knit 6, place 2 stitches on extra needle this time hanging on the other side (so now the first cable will pass in front of the second), purl 2, purl stitches on extra needle
Knit 8, 2 stitches on needle, purl 2, purl stitches on other needle
Repeat previous line 6 times
Knit 6, purl 2, knit 4, purl 2, moss stitch to the end.

5a. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2
Purl 5, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 2, knit 1, ssk
Purl 6, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 2, knit 1, ssk
Repeat last line 6 times
Purl 5, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end
Wrong side-Moss stitch 8, purl 2, knit 4, purl 2
Knit 5, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Knit 6, purl 2, knit 2, purl 2
Repeat previous line 6 times
Knit 5, purl 2, knit 4, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

6a. Right side- Moss stitch 8, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2
Purl 4, knit 2 together, knit 1, pick up 1, purl 2, pick up 1, knit 1, ssk
Repeat previous line 8 times
Purl 4, knit 2, purl 4, knit 2, moss stitch to the end
Wrong side- Moss stitch 8, purl 2
Knit 4, purl 2
Repeat previous line 17 times
Knit 4, purl 2, moss stitch to the end

   So now you need to repeat sequences 1-6a until the blanket is roughly as long as it is wide minus 2 inches for the border (ex. my blanket turned out to be roughly 34"x34" so I worked the cabling until I reached 32") Make sure you end on sequence 6a and then work sequence 1 for 8 rows just like the beginning.  Finish out with 2" worth of the moss stitch, cast off and there you have it!

*Pick up one purl side- basically anytime I say to pick up 1 you need to pick up the stitch the same way you would purl


   Ending note: I've read and re-read this for mistakes and I think I caught it all, please let me know if there is something I missed or that you don't understand. I will be happy to help! And reviews are much appreciated, this is the first time I have ever tried to put my stitches in writing and I would like to get better at it.

Keeping the Joy

   Joy. Something I know that all mothers struggle with keeping in their hearts day to day.  Let's face it- dishes, laundry, meals, diapers, and baby drama isn't exactly what you dreamed of when you said "I want to be a mom".  It's so easy to get run down and even bitter, towards your children and/or your husband, even if you have the best possible family life there is to have.  

   The only solution, or the only one I've found, is to be purposeful in keeping your joy.  We're not talking about happiness but straight up, hardcore Joy.  That beautiful thing that makes the endless pile of laundry not quite so daunting and the diaper explosions laughable.  Joy gives us the ability to unfocus on OUR problems, OUR worries, OUR struggles and see the bigger, brighter plan in it all.  These are a few things that I've found to help me see that when I just want to curl up in a ball and eat chocolate.

#1 Let yourself fall in love with your kids

  If there's one thing I've learned from my parents and my husbands parents it's that love covers a multitude of sins.  Or better said here, "knowing that you love them no matter what covers a lot of mistakes with your kids".  Growing up I never doubted that my parents loved me, and I knew that everything they did was out of their love for me and my brothers- even their mistakes.  I may have hated getting spanked (which I was, very necessarily) or told being "no" but I knew I was loved and that made me want to please them more than anything else.

#2 Love your spouse

   Our daughter is only 7 months old but she knows that in this house we adore daddy.  Even in her tiny little space of comprehension she can see that momma loves daddy and so therefore she loves daddy too.  In God's order of priorities He is first, then your marriage, THEN your children.  If you weren't raised like that it can sound kind of mean to put a fully functional adult over helpless children,  but believe me, you wouldn't be doing them any favors by letting your marriage slip away.  Your marriage, your relationship with your spouse, is the foundation on which your children will learn to stand, if that breaks down so do they.

   Think of it as keeping a fire lit.  You're the oxygen, he's the fuel; you both need to be close, together on things, balanced, whatever you want to call it- to keep those little flames burning.  God gave us this order for a reason, we are created to need this pattern in our lives.

#3 Realize that you are the best mom ever

   No life is a mistake and therefore no parent is a mistake either.  God gave you your children; they're crazy personalities, querks, everything, for a reason.  And that reason is that you are the best person on the face of the earth to be their mom.  He knows exactly what kind of a mother they need. YOU.

#4 Learn

  I like to look at motherhood and wifedom as the super hardcore class on the fruits of the spirit.  Seriously, look up Galatians 5:22-23, and tell me if there is one that we don't have to exercise daily.  It's also kind of a 'learn as ya go' deal, so there have been, are, and will continue to be mistakes.  Days where you throw your phone across the room in frustration (guiltily raises hand), spank your child to hard or often (we're not quite there yet with our daughter), or just yell (raises hand again).  Afterwards, we (I) need to sit down and purposefully look at where we went wrong.  What fruits do we (I) need to work on? Gentleness? Long-suffering? 

   Our children are one of God's biggest tools in teaching us His grand plan for us.  Through motherhood He allows us to experience a fraction of His selflessness, mercy, and most of all, His love for us.  I like to look at it as if He gives us the opportunity to see His love at an angle only for mothers.

#5 Love God

  This is the key to everything, it makes all these points that I've laid out fall in place.  So many times we (I) look to our (my) husband and children to fill our (my) emotional, physical, and spiritual needs but they're human, they are incapable of meeting all of our needs.  Try as they might, they will fail and fail and fail again.  But the beauty of it is that if we allow God to step in and fulfill all of those needs, which is what He truly wants to do, we are freed up to simply love and enjoy our spouses and children as they are.  Flawed little beings, just like us.

   I hope that you found this helpful and encouraging, I know that it was helpful for me to write it. Hopefully I didn't ramble too much and my comma placement isn't too atrocious.  And if it is I guess you can get over it ;)

God bless,

Emily